A Better Way? OR shades of A Christmas Carol

A Better Way? OR shades of A Christmas Carol

I saw a conversation on Facebook recently, which prompted me to think about some things in a little more detail.

I’m a member of quite a few ‘Women in Business’ groups on Facebook.  This makes sense to me because, I’m a woman, and I’m in business.

I saw a discussion between two women on one group which went a little like this:

W1) I’ve fallen behind with some of my work, I had a chat with my client at our local business forum, and once I’d explained the circumstances, we’ve reached an agreement, I’m so glad we can do that with other women!

W2) Why were you discussing personal matters at a business forum? That’s not what they are for, they’re for discussing business!

As a person with quite radical views (my day job is Public Health, so the big picture is my default!) I see women’s forums as not only giving a leg-up and co-operation, but as a potential forum to change the way we do business altogether.

The way I see it is this.

I don’t believe our current ‘business model’ is working. We separate ‘home’ and ‘work’ to such an extent that it’s often believed that you can’t do as high a quality of work from home, you MUST adhere to a 9-5 working pattern to work effectively, and you MUST be present in the office as much as possible to work effectively, you must keep home and work entirely separate.

This reduces chances for many people in the workplace, the ‘traditional’ dad who works long hours and comes home to his pipe and slippers and the ‘Mother’ always happy baking and preparing wholesome home cooked meals, keeping the home spotless and raising perfectly groomed children.

But what if dad is happier at home doing the housework or recognises that his spouse has greater earning capacity and is willing to sacrifice time with the children for the common good of the family?

How does that work?

Quite honestly: it doesn’t.

In order to ‘succeed’ in any strand of ‘business’ you MUST become a pipe and slippers dad (even if you are female).  You must manage ALL personal problems outside work, you must not be affected by typical issues child raising issues, and if there are any problems, it’s mums’ job to sort them, as dad is too busy. Even when dad stays at home, to deal with these problems!

Over the years my husband has been subjected to a huge variety of bad feeling, simply because he’s a bloke. From ‘freezing out’ at baby groups, surprise that he attends the majority of school events, teachers, health care professionals and others preferring to speak to ‘mum’, even once my daughter was told by a teacher that ‘it must be a treat for you, if dads making tea tonight’ (dad makes tea every night because mum can’t get home in time).

But what is the obsession with rigidity around working patterns? Even shifts could be properly covered if people were given the responsibility to work it between themselves.

We need to consider new and different ways of working in as many forums as possible, to the benefit of all.

I run my own Etsy store in my spare time, I can literally pick and choose when to work, and it works great for me, my clients neither know nor care when their order was made, just as long as they get it! I see no problem with being totally honest when I’m struggling to make sufficiently quickly to keep up, and I’ve found the vast majority of my customers are very understanding too.

We need to look at the business model as a whole entity and consider widespread change, what does ‘professional’ look like, honest and late, or knackered, potentially substandard and on time?

Why does ‘family time’ have to wrap round ‘work time’? Why not the other way round?

Scrooge learned this lesson, why do we ignore it?